Family

Tribute to Dad

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L.D. “Babby” Hand, Jr., certainly the greatest father in the world, went to be with the Lord September 27, 2009.  I can’t begin to describe the deep levels of impact Dad has had in my life and walk with the Lord.  He was a quiet man.  His words were few but if you caught him at the right time the communication you received was priceless!  He had a special way to assess a situation with wisdom.  When he told you what he thought, it was quality, sage advice – never overexaggerated opinion.  Yet, due to his quiet ways, he often could catch you off guard with his witty sense of humor.  His laugh and his smile are engraved in my memory.  Hopefully this post will capture a scant portion of some moments of his dry wit – read on below.

The funeral was extremely God honoring and humbling.  Dad never liked any extra attention, but it was a very accurate celebration of his life.  He met Jesus in a personal way about 20 years or so ago. Basically we’ve been celebrating with him ever since then here on earth, now we celebrate him being fully in God’s presence.  My father had always been a church attender and perhaps had a meaningful salvation experience early on in life.  But about 20 years ago – roughly the same time my life changed as a student in college – I began to notice many distinct changes in my Dad’s life.  God’s powerful love seemed to flow through him.  And he began to serve the Lord – in many ways totally behind the scenes.  He volunteered at the state prison nearby – working with Prison Fellowship Ministries to coordinate Bible Studies.  For many years he coordinated the Project Angel Tree program for our county – providing Christmas presents for the children of prison inmates who would not get to spend Christmas with their fathers.

My brother Hollis spoke at the service – following up a great message from two different pastors – and really put an incredible cap on the whole service.  It was a wonderful tribute – just perfect for illustrating how Dad had a strong faithfulness to us that we never doubted.

For the full text of Hollis’ tribute, click here to download the text file. But here are a few choice excerpts.  My slight edits are in [brackets]:

“[Dad] always persevered through adversity through faith and hard work. He was very fortunate to not struggle with materialism as so many men do. He did not care at all if our house was relatively older and smaller than most of our neighbors. . . . He had no problem at all with driving older, rusted cars rather than buy one he couldn’t afford. I remember being very upset with him when I was about 14 or 15 years old and we had only one car in our family, an old Chevrolet Nova – [no air conditioning] – with almost 200,000 miles on it. [But now]  how proud I am now of how disciplined he was with our family finances!”

”     Dad’s own legacy is that he loved the Lord with all his heart, and to his family he showed unconditional love and commitment that honored God. His life and ministry to others are evidence of Christ’s overflowing love that lived in his heart. As it is written in God’s word:

Love is patient, love is kind it does not envy, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.

1 Corinthians 13,1-8, NIV

Anyone who knew my Dad would agree that you could easily substitute his name in place of the word  “love” in this passage.  Dad showed his love for David and me in the most excellent of ways: he was always telling us how proud he was of us, and he always wanted to spend time with us.  David and I enjoyed spending time in his office with him when he was president of the Hand Trading Company. We went with him to the Albany airport when we were young to watch the airplanes land and take off, and Dad renewed his pilot’s license so he could take the whole family on an airplane ride in order to celebrate David’s 6th birthday. We went to see air shows to see air force jets and other military aircraft perform. We would build model airplanes and rockets together, and then go to my granddaddy’s farm to shoot the rockets into the air in a field and watch them parachute down. Some of those rockets are still on the mantle of the fireplace in the den of mom’s house, as a reminder of his legacy of love for his sons.”

Family

More on Dad’s Health

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As I reported a little over two weeks ago, my father hasn’t been doing so well.

He went back in the hospital about 4 days ago.  I’m in Pelham with he and Mom now.  We’re taking turns at the hospital.

Dad’s condition from his dementia has slowly declined over the last few weeks.  Additionally, just after he was admitted to the hosptial a few new issues have cropped up, including:  some sort of upper GI problem or small ucler, an infection causing bleeding in the urinary tract – most likely caused by prostate irritation, and even hiccups that simply will not go away!

The infection and the other problems have left him too weak to walk, and his mental and verbal abilities have really tanked.  At times he is hallucinating, we think.  It is really hard to tell what he is thinking or feeling at times.

This morning, however, Dad did perk up a bit and actually had a very brief “conversation” with his doctor.  I think Dad basically told him he wanted to “get out of here.”  The rest of today he has been quite restful, thankfully.

We’ll keep you posted.  The doctor indicated it’ll be at least 2 or 3 more days before his infection is under control.

Family

Dad’s Health

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Last Sunday David’s Dad had another mild stroke and was admitted to the hospital.  This was the second or third he’s had this year.  Unfortunately, there might be more to come as a result of his Vascular Dementia – very similar to Alzheimer’s.   For the last five years, his mental and physical capacities have been slowly degraded by this disease.   See Here for previous posts and photos.

The good news is he was released from the hospital and has, to a certain extent, “bounced back” to his pre stroke level.  I’ve been able to spend several days with he and Mom at their home in Pelham, Georgia (my hometown too) since he came home.

Although his verbal skills have declined, he still is able to walk slowly. At first he seemed a little confused as to who I was, but after a day or so he was at ease – even showing his dry humor occassionally. My Mom usually has to guide him along and tell him what to do – step by step, one thing at a time, giving very precise instructions. Doing any complex task confuses him, but some would argue that this condition exists naturally in our family!  A couple of times he cracked a joke with my Mom while she was “instructing him” – guess he wanted to show that he still has an edge.

Gratefully, we have health care options available for him if and when he needs them. Actually, Mom already has some home health assistance – giving Dad basic care three times a week.  Also, Pelham has an excellent nursing home care facility.   I’ve been on a real learning curve this week of finding out how one could gain admittance to such a facility and how complicated it is to have Medicaid pay for any portion of it.   Complicated, but not impossible.  If he needs 24-7 care, I’m so thankful that the nursing home is a possibility.  Beyond that, I’m amazed at the Lord’s kindness through everyday people who are helping look after my Mom and Dad.  Lots of prayers have been answered through the loving support of many people – it’s been a wonderful thing to watch.

We’re not sure exactly what will happen next. Neither am I sure of why some people get Alzheimers and some don’t.  Parents are supposed to live a long time and enjoy their grandchildren, but some will not. My Dad may have many good days left where I can still see his eyes light up and his big smile. But that is not guaranteed.

What is guaranteed is that God is good.   All the time.   The fact that He gives mercy to me as a sinner, and yes a big “AND” here – my continual acceptance and approval as a son He loves IS guaranteed.  Jesus sealed it.  Love for my Mom and Dad are sealed too as they have received Christ and rejoice in what He’s done.  His love transcends all health problems, all calamities, all the financial “thin ice” that we sit upon in dealing with any major health problem, anything that causes a rational man to worry.  The very fact that God went out of His way to demonstrate His love is proof that He is good. But He is not even required to do that to show Himself as good.  He just is.

Cru Digital Ministry

Blue Letter Bible

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Following Jesus is a response to His lavish grace and love. It involves repentance, which is also a response to His great initiatives of kindness and love.

Often the closer I get to Jesus the more I see I need Him.  The more I see I’m so prone to sin.  I’m pondering and wanting to understand more of the stark contrast between wordly and godly sorrow.  Here’s the quote from a Bible commentary which really gripped me:

The sorrow of carnal men about worldly objects, loss of fortune, fame, or friends; which, being separated from the fear and love of God, and faith in his providence and mercy, frequently drinks up their spirits, breaks their proud, rebellious hearts, or drives them to lay desperate hands on themselves.

Btw, I was looking at 2 Corinth 7:10 on Blue Letter Bible.  this is where I found the commentary.

What’s of further interest is that BLB has a MOBILE VERSION – sweet on a cell phone browser.  Check it out here:  http://mobile.blb.org/